A friend and I had the privilege of sitting in a Syrian refugee’s living room, simply decorated with very basic furnishings.
We had gone to deliver some clean second-hand clothing that had been donated to a distribution point we manage. We also had some toys and night-time pads for children to give to certain families. The first family we went to offered us Arabic coffee. We accepted the family’s invitation because we have learned that they want to show gratitude to those who show acts of kindness.
While sitting and having coffee with the mother, we learned her 17-year-old daughter is going to get married in a month or so, and mom is a professional tailor but had no material to make the wedding gown. After we finished our coffee, we invited the mother and daughter to go with us by car and go to a haberdashery. It turned out we had to drive about 30 minutes to a place where we could purchase fabric for a wedding dress. We discovered a place called Kaplan in Pendik. Anyone who loves crafts, sewing, knitting and so on would love this huge shop. It had everything this lovely seamstress from Aleppo needed to make a wedding dress for her daughter. Though these Syrian and Iraqi refugees have been uprooted from their homes, life goes on.
picture: bridesmaid dresses onlineWe also decided to purchase a new sewing machine and a gun for our Syrian friend. This would provide her with the dignity of being able to generate her own income. Mind you, not the kind of gun that first comes to mind! It was nothing to do with the Second Amendment of the US Constitution or joining the coalition against the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant (ISIL). It was a glue gun (for beads and sequins) as part of the sewing equipment purchased for this precious lady. It brought joy to our hearts to see her eyes light up as we gave her these things so she could prepare for her daughter’s wedding.
The Syrian and Iraqi refugees are not just “swarms” or “masses” of people. They’re people. They’re individuals. They’re individuals who deserve dignity and respect. One of the most complex issues of our day has hit the Middle Eastern country of Turkey especially hard. The Syrian refugee crisis — as it has been dubbed — offers no simple solutions, no easy answers. However, if we who have normal lives and roofs over our heads can be tolerant and kind towards those who are victims of ISIL and Syrian President Bashar al-Assad, it will make the world a better place.
That evening in the home of the Syrian seamstress, I was reminded that life goes on as a refugee: Children have birthdays, boys have circumcisions and young people marry and women have babies. While having coffee with them, another daughter of theirs, who was about 14, came home from working all day washing dishes in a café. She was thrilled with the Barbie doll we had brought for her. Forced to work during the day, she is happy to escape and be a kid for a few hours. I could not help but think to myself she should be in school.
Let me share another story of one family’s exodus from Syria, painting a picture of the need for a tangible expression of what Christmas is all about to me — love and giving.
We had just delivered some children’s clothes, a carpet and a hot water heater to Hanan and her family. The warm jackets we had were both for girls — fine for their 6-year-old, but we hadn’t realized her 8-year-old was a boy. Nevertheless, they took the dark pink fur-lined winter jacket gladly and he put it on, proudly parading around the house. “It’s fine,” she assured us, “We can’t afford to be fussy about the color.” “How many brothers and sisters do you have?” we asked the boy. We learned that there were five, and they had all fled from Aleppo to Turkey.
Hanan talked about the day that changed their lives. They had lived in a four-floor apartment building, with two apartments per floor. A bomb made a direct hit on the building, flattening it so only the ground floor remained. Hanan was outside in the yard, and she raced into the rubble, screaming for her children and also calling out the names of her sisters. The children were fine, but shaken. Her sisters had not been at home, thankfully. Having escaped with their lives, they’d lost everything and decided to flee across the border for the bomb had been dropped by their own government.
It is hard for many of us to imagine that another individual of the same nationality would turn on us and do harm. But it happens.
I am reminded of the famous quote by John Bunyan which goes like this, “You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.”
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